Some Sundays the Lord just seems to reach down and cover me with blessing. Usually it happens when I'm responsible for contributing to the service in some way. This week, I was scheduled to sing a solo.
Now, let me first clarify: I have a love/hate relationship with singing solos. I do not like my singing voice. In the shower it's fabulous. In the car even, it's not terribly objectionable. In a group, I'm great at blending with those around me. But put me in front of anyone and have me sing by myself, and my voice devolves into that of a shy, breathless 13-year-old girl. However, music is one of God's greatest gifts to minister to my heart. "I sing for I cannot be silent" should be the epitaph on my tombstone. The Lord uses music in my life to teach and admonish me so often that I cannot help but testify of Him in song. Might as well tell my heart not to beat. When solo time rolls around on the schedule, more often than not I've had a song in mind for weeks beforehand, one the Lord has been ever-so-gently hammering into my soul.
Yesterday's selection - "In My Weakness" - was one such song. It's been next in line for months. However, last time I was on the schedule, I had a really rough morning on the Sunday I was supposed to sing. By the time we were done practicing, the pianist and I both knew I would not make it through singing that morning. So it got postponed. The timing was of the Lord (it always is), and yesterday my turn came 'round again. This is the first time I can remember singing a "sheet music" special - something not out of the WILDS songbook or something similar. I have plenty I'd LOVE to sing, but my limited range eliminates most of them.
Anyway, as I was driving to church yesterday morning, the Lord and I were having a "discussion." Once in a while, He insists that I give a testimony about the song I'm going to sing. I don't like doing it, because by the time I'm done talking, I'm breathless and three times as nervous as I was previously. But He insisted that was the point. The song was about my weakness displaying His strength. He wanted me to be "weak" when I sang, to use that to demonstrate His strength through me. Let's just say He had plenty of weakness to work with. ;-)
But it was a lovely day, and a lesson most needed. I've had a rather rough several months spiritually, but the Savior has oh-so-gently been nudging me back under His wings, comforting me with His love and chastening me with gentleness.
Another song He has been using in my life lately is "Don't Forget" from the WILDS album
Come Bless the Lord. I put it on my "2007 Sacred Favorites Mix," not really thinking it special at the time, but knowing that the words would get to me eventually. They did. ;-)
"Don't forget all He's done
Don't forget victories won
Don't forget in the race
He gave strength for the run
Don't forget Jesus' care
Don't forget answered prayer
Don't forget, don't forget,
You saw His hand everywhere
Remember your Lord God Jehovah
Remember how much you were changed by His Word
Forget not the days
He taught you to praise
Though hard seemed the way of the Lord
Remember how far that He took you
When He gave you a hunger to abide
Oh, don't turn Him away
He bids you to stay
Right where you belong at His side,
How the time has gone by
And the memories have died
I've forgotten the joy
When in Him I abide
How I long for the day
When His strength was my stay
Lord forgive, Lord renew,
Lord revive me today.
Remember your Lord God Jehovah
Remember how much you were changed by His Word
Forget not the days
He taught you to praise
Though hard seemed the way of the Lord
Remember how far that He took you
When He gave you a hunger to abide
Oh, don't turn Him away
He bids you to stay
Though gone be your song
The weak or the strong
Stay where you belong at His side.
Don't forget. Don't forget."